a young marriage in trouble

[lnlyshp]

I plan to purchase the materials once I have a better idea of how the money situation is looking.

I think many of her issues with marriage included:
- Me being overbearing
- loneliness
- feeling unappreciated
- my frequent leaving at night
- Emotional distance (this is a big one I think)

One thing that I got angry over was her relationship with a male coworker. I felt that their relationship went beyond the scope of a professional one, and I told her this made me uncomfortable. The cause of the big fight was my discovering a text he had sent her and subsequently realizing that she had deleted the conversation beforehand. The text in and of itself was not anything bad, I think it simply said "about?", but I was very angry that this was going and that she had deleted the previous messages to hide them from me. I asked her to choose between her friendship and her marriage (something I should NOT have done) and she explained that maybe we shouldn't be together if I won't allow her to have friends

While I know I acted rashly in this situation, I still feel that it was very disrespectful on her part to try and hide it from me. I am afraid that she is having an affair, and unsure if I would be willing to reconcile if she is.

That said, I still do not know and realize I may be jumping to conclusions.