Rppfl, my wife walked out the day after I discovered the sexting on Aug 5, and moved in with her mom. She left the kids here but for the entire month of Aug they had no idea she was even gone. She would show up before they woke up and always had some "activity" to go do that would bring her home "after they were in bed" as far as they knew. That ended the first of Sept when she decided to tell them she was living at Grandma's. From the middle of Sept to lust a few weeks ago she has been less involved with them. Lately, she has made an effort to call them every morning and has seen them the last couple of Sundays.
Ok, got it. Do you have a sharing plan? It doesn't sound like it. Kids like routines, something they can count on. "You'll spend the night with mom every Tuesday night" or "you'll spend every other Saturday with mom". Is that possible? Would your W agree to that?
It seems like the goal is to increase W's time at your house, where the girls are comfortable. Could you help them plan a special dinner or tea party that they then invite mom to? Could you ask her to watch them on the weekend because you have to run an errand? It doesn't have to be all of you all together, in fact, the girls may get more attention from mom if you are not around.
