Trying to stay patient- part 7

[Zues126]

Maybe I'm wrong but I've been pretty distant from STBX and have struggled with some negative emotions at time. What I've been asking myself is "if I wasn't hurt or angry, what type of relationship would I want with the mother of my children? Friends? Neighborly? Or distant?"

I'm going with distant/neighbor. Frankly I don't need her as a friend. After what she's done I just don't see her as someone I would want to be close too. I consider tearing apart a family, alcoholism, etc, as traits I can't accept. I wouldn't be friends with anyone that acted this way, not just STBX. So I can work with her as needed to Coparent, but not much more there.

Of course, DB coach tells me we're 'not there yet' meaning not to worry about what type of long term R I want just yet, so I'm trying not to be TOO cold. Not easy.