I am still early in the DB process. But I wanted to know what is the general approach to involvement of the OM in the children's lives.
To elaborate, my W's A partner was a good friend of ours. He and his STBXW were at our house all the time. Our children played together. We still see him at community events all the time. My kids still occasionally ask why they can't have play dates with his kids. My kids still say hi to him when they see him. To my knowledge, my wife is keeping her A activity and OM separate from the children. I do not think she is actively trying to bring him back into their lives, but I can't be certain. I obviously don't want him around us at all. He seduced my wife and destroyed two families in the process. Even his STBXW wants to be friends with my W again - no clue why - must be needy. I would be willing to move, just so I would never have to see his ugly face again. of course, my wife is suddenly in love with our town and would be unwilling to move.
I don't mind if my W wants to continue seeing him or even marry him - that's her mistake to make. I am working on myself and preparing for the likely D that is coming. But I don't want him or his family involved in my children's lives in any way. One reason is because I don't want him influencing my children in any way - he has already proven himself to be a manipulative liar. Another reason, admittedly, is because I would be terrified at the thought of my children being buddies with him.
Is there any way that I can set a boundary to protect my kids from his vile influence. Can I specify in the mediation process that I don't want him near my children? Do I have to just accept that my W wants to be with this sleaze and let the chips fall where they may? I have told my wife that I do not want him around the children. I have no idea if she is complying. Are there any threads or comprehensive posts on this topic?
