BUT - I suspect, whatever happens, you're going to be ok in the end.
Your H might come back - ESPECIALLY if he sees you moving on and moving away, it makes him face the consequences of his actions a lot sooner than if you stayed there mooning away in the background, waiting as his Plan B in case things don't work out with OW.
But if he doesn't - you might get a little further from the situation and realize maybe he wasn't as good a spouse for you as you think. After all, this is a guy who after 25 years together, had managed to accumulate NO ASSETS, apparently kept you in the dark about the true financial situation, he really failed as a husband in that arena. You might eventually come to realize he was failing you in other areas as well.
I was married for 24 years, I loved my husband and fought very hard to preserve my marriage. But now that I've been divorced for several years, I see him - and the marriage - in a different light. I spent all those years walking on eggshells, trying to keep him happy but knowing I couldn't really count on him when the chips are down. He was critical and a perfectionist and somewhat selfish - and possibly cheated on me much more than I thought at the time of the divorce (funny little past incidents now look more suspicious than they did at the time...).
My new guy? Treats me like gold, is super-supportive, even when he's struggling with some issue of his own always makes the effort to give me a shoulder to cry on and some sage advice about my own family and business struggles. It makes me realize how much of this I NEVER got from my ex.
And although I make much less money than my Ex does, having complete control over my budget allows me to arrange things in such a way that I have financial peace.
Focus on building an exciting new life for YOU - your H will either be wondering whop this exciting new woman is and come after you, or you will find new, better love to fill your life. Either way, you win!
Try new things. Aspire to something you never thought you could do (I learned to play the drums in my 50's and now play for a pop-punk cover band ). Living well is the best revenge.
). Living well is the best revenge.
