So I am growing increasingly tired of limbo..."playing house," pretending, whatever it is. I told H this summer on vacation that communication is important...yet he continues down this path.

With that being said I do see myself reverting back into old patterns as far as interactions with H. Maybe because I feel like I'm not being true to myself in some ways.

Today, after cleaning my room and bathroom I got in the shower, he was gone when I got out. When he came home a couple of hours later I was watching TV and then went in my room and was reading. He came in later and asked if I was feeling sick today? I can't have a lazy day?

I also feel I have been thinking more lately of what he is doing...mostly in regards to contact with other women, not healthy for my PMA.

Tomorrow is a new day, I need to start fresh.

Me-44 (45)
H- 50 (51)
M-'96

S-18(20)D-15(17)D-12(14)

BD Feb 2014 (he works overseas)
home Oct(sep rooms)
(EAs possible Pa's unconfirmed)
insists wants D through July 2015
no more talk of D since