You're right Mozza, this would be a great opportunity to validate - if I wanted to save my M. But the truth is, I don't know that I do anymore. Like sandi mentioned, I think I've only been in it for the 'win'. I think there's a 99% chance we're headed towards D. I won't respond at all because it's too easy to argue with almost every sentence in her email. Her POV is 'I've decided to leave the M, so here's what's best for the kids' while mine has been 'here's what's best for the kids'.
I deserve better. I've gone through a lot of hurt because of W's actions during our S. Then to find out that there were at least 2 instances of inappropriate behavior by W prior to BD that she never planned on telling me about- why would I want to be with that person? And because she's unwilling to discuss those instances, I find it hard to imagine finding our way back to each other down the road. I think I'd still have a lot of anger and resentment.
W was an amazing and thoughtful mother for 14 years. However, this past year she acted out of selfishness. I don't say that out of anger. I say that based on words and attitude shown towards W by the kids. I don't encourage it, but I also don't think it's my job to rebuild W's relationship with the kids. She's made poor choices and now is wanting me to clean up her mess and 'support' her. Use the sleepover as an example- D10 called W the night before, asking her to call her friend's mom to set it up, because in her words 'it's not that mommy forgets, she just won't do it.' And sure enough, when W came to pick up D10 yesterday, she still hadn't set it up. I think that's what set D10 off into her 'mood'. And I'm not going to cover or make excuses for W. This isn't a competition of who can be the better parent, but all I can do is focus on being the best dad I can be. What's sad is that D10 is at an age in which she needs a strong female role model, and she's not getting that in her mother.
