Trying to stay patient- part 7

[Georgiabelle]

Tarheel,

I think you did the right thing by not responding. Mmmmmmmm. Let me see if I can phrase this next part appropriately with sounding like I have a 2x4. (Hate those things and I know I need them frequently). I do think it appears you undermined your W's time with D. I understand your d didn't want to go (I deal with this all of the time) and I have always told my kids that it's good for them to spend time with their dad. I have also told them when they told me they were going to refuse to go that they need to tell their Dad. In the spirit of candor, initially their Dad would text me that they were children and had no choice. He then decided they couldn't be forced as my s11and D9 are almost my size and I could not physically make them go.

Perhaps a better way to handle it would have been to tell D that you were sorry about the sleepover and that she needed to talk things out with her mom. She is 10 so she should honestly have these types of conversations with her mom. They can't be forced, although you do need to be careful with how you handle interactions and their time with your w. My xh will actually ask if it's okay for the kids because he knows I have them around 90% of the time. I try to be very flexible because I want what is best for my little peeps. I do believe deep down my xh feels the same. We just don't talk :-)

Let things transpire. Your kids need both parents. However, the reality is each parent will have different capacities although they both love the kids. Focus on you and be a great dad.