Barrybran - [Insert Original Thread Title Here]

[Barrybran]

I got some good spew for the first time in a while and a confirmation that the person inhabiting my wife's body right now is not my wife. My son was being rude to me and I calmly told him that I didn't appreciate it. My wife defended my son and told me I was being rude. I took a breath and restated to my wife and son that I felt S7 was being rude. That started my wife...

She said that I had things I wanted to say to her and I agreed. I told her that I wanted to be able to talk constructively with her to which she replied that unless it was about the house or kids, she wasn't interested in discussing anything. I responded by calmly stating that I felt she had been disrespectful and ignorant towards me the past 2.5 weeks and I felt that we were even unable to talk about the house and kids properly.

I probably should have stopped the conversation there but it briefly veered towards our relationship over the past year, me talking about my personal growth, her telling me that I was speaking to her like a child and that I would always be a cheater. I told her this was unfair and that I hoped her attitude towards this would change in the future. She laughed sarcastically at me and I dropped the conversation.

I still have some work to do with these conversations. I could have stopped it much earlier, and should have, though I am a lot better at recognising these situations, breathing and thinking through it and changing course quickly. I also feel a lot more confident calling her out on her poor behaviour, bringing it up out of self-respect and self-worth if I feel the need arise. I'm also able to shrug off negative comments ("once a cheater, always a cheater") because I know who I am, where I've come from and where I want to go. I do hope my real wife returns some time in the next 12 months but I'm not going to put up with her sh!t in the meantime.

I wish I could get inside her head at times. I'd love to find out what has caused this mammoth turnaround in her attitude towards me in such a short time. I'll just ride it out and keep on trucking.