It doesn't feel like a fairytale anymore...

[fthnluv]

Had a decent day yesterday. Met with my pastor who told me that he thinks that H and I WILL reconcile at some point, likely 2-3 years or more down the road (as the MLC and life takes its course he says). He thinks that H will likely have to D, remarry OW and then D again before he comes to his senses. This is a huge turnaround because he has always said that he thought we would likely never reconcile due to my H's very adamant decision to D. He told me that he had told me that in the past because he needed me to begin to accept that there will be a D and begin to move forward with my own life. He feels like I am making good progress there so he felt comfortable in giving me shared hope. He does intend to keep me moving forward, though, and said he will press me on letting go and taking care of myself as we go along. I'm just happy to have another person join me in hope.

I also spoke to H for about an hour yesterday. It was a good conversation about his upcoming trip home for Thanksgiving weekend (I will let him have the kids to himself starting Friday) and he also plans to go to all family functions as normal for Christmas this year and says he is fine with me being there with the kids as normal. I am so happy to hear this, I was dreading either him not coming home for Christmas or me being "uninvited" (by myself, so that the kids don't have to miss their Dad I would not go instead if it came down to that). I realize that this, like my D's birthday party, may change as we get closer to the holiday so I am just keeping up my prayers in this area.

Our conversation was long mostly because he wanted to talk about our financial deal and I had to explain my reasons for many of the things I added so that he knew where I was coming from (ie: length of spousal support needs to be longer than normal due to him living across the country which does not allow me to work). Sometimes things that are written do not come across the way you want them to or the reasoning is unclear so we discussed much of that and he *seemed* to be agreeable to most of it. We shall see, it's a negotiation, I guess.

Did some more work on getting back into school today. I think I will only be able to do 1 class next semester but then go back full time in the fall when all of my kids are in school or pre-school. Exciting developments!