Need Help before I blow a fuse - Part 2

[20&lost]

W left house last night at 8pm and said she was going tanning booth. Took her 2 hours and the place is only 2 blocks away. She did come home and actually talk to me stuff with daughter and came into bedroom while I was getting ready to go to bed and share a funny story with me. Don't know if this is positive. Still do not know if EA has gone to PA. According to DB I'm not to check and act "as if" nothing is going on, to ignore it. However, our R will never get on track if there is a OM in the picture. Do not know whether or not to face this head on with W or just chill for a while longer. On some things I see some minor baby steps however, based on the amount of time each week my W goes off the grid (disappears) things could be heating up with OM. I know spying is against the rules but for some reason I feel it is better to be locked and loaded....Any suggestions would be appreciated. My W is not your typical female, she has a great deal of tom boy tenancies and very few female friends. She just gets along better with male friends...