Merrick I agreee with Bridget on this one. Maybe it is time to move out. Give her the space and see what comes of it. You are going nowhere in your present state. Talk to your lawyer and see if some kind of deal like I am doing is a possibility? Im in the house for 2 days she is in for 2 days and the weekends alternate every other. They call it a 2-2-3. It sounds like a pain but I like it. The kids stay, you still get considerable time with them and still get time for you. The other man thing is none of your concern. You can do nothing about that. Its a cheeseless tunnel dude. Who cares if he is in the picture. The seperation will give your w a taste of life on her own. This reality is setting in hard on my W. Be strong and really disconnect and show her your strength. Let her own guilt and conscence work on her I wish I had more time to chat on this subject Merrick. I am off to the north woods for the weekend so I wont be around a computer till Monday. I will try to think on this more over the wweekend while Im drownding worms and skiing. Thinking of you... KOFTGF, God Bless, Eddy