3 months after BD, the roller coaster ride hurts

[Mozza]

I sympathize. Living together during separation is very, very difficult. It's such an emotional drain. And you had to face this reversal today -- though you did say a week ago that he only wanted friendship.

The split chin episode is very telling to me: he's checked out. He's indifferent. And you don't need to describe the feeling is disconnect from having a spouse turn into a stranger. I know it. I tried to talk about it with my W (long before DB...) and she looked at my plainly and said "It's difficult to hear. Don't you have friends who will discuss this?" It's almost impossible to understand them with our current feelings. We're at opposite ends of the spectrum.

To me, and I'm no vet, it seems like you're starting to do the right thing by putting your foot down. The thing with DB is that it can't be faked. You'll have to detach for real. That's when the magic might start to happen. That's where the true hope lies. But it will get worse before it gets better. Good luck and keep posting.