Hey Merrick, I'm just a lurker here, but if I were you, I'd try to avoid moving out at all costs. When you move out, you lose a lot if she ends up filing for a D. The "status quo" at that point is that you are out of the house, and you (usually) don't have the kids. The "status quo" is usually maintained as of the date and time of the divorce petition filing, until a temporary order of custody can be reached, which could be several months.
My guess here, but FIL got involved because he was looking at spending a significant amount of money on his girl's divorce attorney. I know I hit up my dad when I was filing (from my first wife). I'd tell in-laws (if you have to talk to them at all), that their daughter is an adult and can handle herself. Also, I would behave as if every word you say on a telephone and even every word you say to her or your in-laws, is being recorded. It's not that they are recording them, but I did. And so did my ex.
Divorce really sucks. Hope you don't have to go there.
