Quick morning journaling. It's boring, so you may want to pass.
W got home about 2 a.m., which is earlier than I expected.
One aside now, that will explain how far I've come in DBing. For about 15 months I've been experiencing hives/angioedema. The angioedema is essentially hives under the skin and it can cause, the eyes, hands, face, and lips to swell tremendously (please, no remedies on this--I've been to docs and have read all there is to read). It started about three months prior to our troubles, but there is little doubt that ongoing stress is a contributing factor. Yesterday was another episode, with the left side of my face and upper lip experiencing severe swelling.
This morning, W did get up about 6:45,and I congratulated her on the victory. She replied that I shouldn't congratulate her because she didn't do anything and that my face still looks grotesque. She suggested I stay home so no one has to look at me. Since this is my affliction, one gets a pretty good sense as to when you are improving or not--so I knew the swelling would be going down this morning (and it has).
In the past, I would have replied (and I thought this today), "Thanks, but I'm comfortable with who I am on the inside, and that's all that counts." Basically, a subtle dig at W. Instead, I just said, "Thanks, but I'm busy at work; I'll just try to stay in my office so others won't see me." That may not sound like much, but the ability to thought stop and avoid saying something that could be construed as confrontational is a big step for me.
