What he puts on there is not a reflection on you -- remember that. And if there is one thing I've learned this year it's that no one is perfect.
I am learning that one for sure, I think I was afraid (maybe still am) that if people knew the H he his now, it would make it harder for him to come back, knowing that people know what he's done to me and the kids. I can't worry about that. He's in God's hands and I certainly cannot control him.
Originally Posted By: Kimmerz
And at one time, my ex husband was a happily married man in love with his wife and his children! As I look back at how things went from great to horrible, it all fell within the MLC pre requesites! Huge life changes, death in the family, near death experience with him, dissatisfaction with his job, job stress, then home life stress due to me working and no time for us.
My husband too. Everyone who learns about us splitting is just completely shocked. WE were the ones that everyone wanted to be like! I tell them, I am as shocked by this turn of events as anyone. I had no clue he was unhappy until it was too late. By the time I had any idea of problems he had already left in his own mind and just sort of went through the motions of counseling and "working on it" while all the while dating others behind my back. Ugh. I can't believe who he is right now.
123Gwen, our situations are so similar. You are doing so well, from what this newbie at all of this can tell. I agree, reading others stories and what is happening to them is so helpful for me too.
Today I took my Grandmother home. I just love spending time with her, she is such a wonderful woman and I am so blessed to still have her in my life. We had such a nice visit, talking, analyzing and watching trashy TV. She even read the Men in Midlife book while she was here and said "It's like H wrote this!", he is so classic MLC. She says she thinks he will come out of this and come back to us but that it will be a while longer and the guilt and shame will likely be the biggest issue with his return. She laughs at him and the OW, it's such an obvious mismatch it's *almost* funny.
Working on getting back into school today. Yay for doing something all about ME!
Me- 40 H- 41 S8, D5, S4 M 19 y T 23 Bomb drop 6/2013 H asked for/filed for D 9/2014 22 yo OW discovered 9/19/14 they're engaged and living together
