I don't know if this will help but I went through a little exercise a few days ago that really helped me get the focus on me (that and the really good advice I've been getting).
Its 5 questions in turn.
1) list 20 things you like about yourself (you're not allowed to include anything that depends on external validation or that's only temporary). Don't move on til you get to twenty.
2) list things you don't like - but stop after 5 minutes then no more.
3) look at the two lists and right a new list - what would you like the list of 20 things you like about yourself to be (same rules as Q1)
4) list what needs to change to get there
5) come up with a list of small actions you can take consistently each day, starting today, to make progress on the changes listed at 4.
It might not help, but to me it felt like taking back a bit more control rather than thrashing helplessly trying to control my situation (or my W). If I can make my answer to Q1 the same as my answer to Q3 then I have no doubt I will have a good and fulfilling life.
Both mid 30s, 2 young kids BD 7sep14 XW moved on long ago, now living with OM1 D paperwork in progress
