You are sure one persistant man!! Alot of other people would have given up in the face of the treatment you are recieving, I'm impressed.
As far as leaving or not........it really comes down to YOU and what YOU want. If your wife isn't happy then that is up to her.
In the end you may well decide that you want to sep. and thats ok, but at least you will know that you have given it your best shot and done all that is in your power to stop it.
I don't know how i would handle the constant hammering, it sounds like a dog with a bone, almost as if she can't let it drop at all or even let you have a moments peace with it!
You are doing so very well.....and i agree....become the OM!!