I wish everyone here could get a "Get out jail free" card! Actually, I,ve been keeping tabs on your last three threads , and you "fish-friendly" sharks have been doing such an admirable job on your sobriety that I felt I have had little to add.
Merrick, I just wanted to touch on ... when it gets tough deal with your W's "drama", you got three great attention getters in your kids! Set up a regime of fun activities to share with them at home. They will help you detach and at the same time, help enforce while in your W's presence who the "new" merrick is. Keep inviting your W to share with the activities if she wants, but make it her choice and let her know you are fine with whether she wants to join in or not.
When it comes to OM , you do have to sit on the curb and let it play out, but I was given the advise of when presenting a PMA around WAW ... to present yourself as now being the OM in the triangle. This is why its important now to be upbeat and confident in your W's presense now, because those are the basic qualities that attact people together, but think back to when you first dated your W ... what were the things you did that attracted her in the first place? ... the way you presented yourself ... the way you dressed, your mannerisms, your interests, etc... What was your self image like then? How is it different now? What 180's can you do to reflect the things you liked about yourself back then that may have altered some now? What are her comments about what has change about you that she doesn't like now? These are the things you can work on now that can make her see you in a new light or rather in the light that first drew her towards you. Think of yourself now as being the OM! If she softens to this new OM in her home, it can open the door that leads to doing more of what works.
Actually, I,ve been keeping tabs on your last three threads 
, and you "fish-friendly" sharks 
have been doing such an admirable job on your sobriety that I felt I have had little to add. 
, you do have to sit on the curb and let it play out, but I was given the advise of when presenting a PMA around WAW ... to present yourself as now being the OM in the triangle. This is why its important now to be upbeat and confident in your W's presense now, because those are the basic qualities that attact people together, but think back to when you first dated your W ... what were the things you did that attracted her in the first place? ... the way you presented yourself ... the way you dressed, your mannerisms, your interests, etc... What was your self image like then? How is it different now? What 180's can you do to reflect the things you liked about yourself back then that may have altered some now? What are her comments about what has change about you that she doesn't like now? These are the things you can work on now that can make her see you in a new light or rather in the light that first drew her towards you. Think of yourself now as being the OM! If she softens to this new OM in her home, it can open the door that leads to doing more of what works.
