I have another question she asked me to buy her a certain music cd that she liked when she was in my car I gave her a lift, now I know the rules say no gifts should I buy her it?
Actually, it says not to buy gifts to make brownie points with your S.
Those "rules" are not intended to replace the book. They are just a few notes, or reminders, based on the contents of the book. Without the book, they could be misinterpreted. Also, they have to be applied according to the individual stitch. As the stitch changes, so should the "rules".
Does she have her own money, or does she solely rely upon your finances? Is it common for her to ask you to get her something she likes?
While you are waiting on the books, you can find the first chapters on the board. Also, be doing a lot of soul searching and list the specific things you need to change to become a better man. Name what you know bothered her. You have already named some things you are improving (which are great, btw) but what about the interaction between your W and you? What would you need to improve there?
Do you know what she needs to feel emotionally connected with you? Do you know her Love Language?
What kind of personality do your W and children see in you? How does your personality and hers differ from each other?
Do you see ways you could polish some manners and charm?
What about her level of attraction to you? Can you tell?
You have three children with her. Why haven't you M her?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
