Doing the limbo thing (thread 7)

[shodan]

My wife is traveling for work to NYC this week (she was gone Tues and Wed nights, back later today). Both mornings she texted me to let me know that she could not sleep. Again, it is so ironic that we could be in this situation and yet my W needs me in bed with her to sleep well.

She then also called me and then emailed me (I did not pick up her phone call because I was on a business call) to let me know what she is going to be gone only 1 night the week of Nov 17th vs. the 2-3 nights she originally planned. She is not traveling next week.

What does this mean? Nothing really but it does show that my wife probably ended the A with the OM (or she would want to be in NYC a lot more often).

What am I doing about out situation? As stated, I am backing away. I have crossfit tomorrow morning and have plans Saturday night with a friend. As everyone has tried to get me to understand, I need to pull back and create an opportunity for her to miss me.

I created the following list that I need to follow:

- I need to detach, not be around as much…give her space
- Don’t talk about R or A
- Stop going to yoga with her…she needs to miss me. We probably go to class together two times per week. We have fun when we go. But I need to stop doing this.
- No runs or walks together. For example, we tend to walk the kids to school together 1-2 times per week. We usually get a coffee on the way back and then go about our days. While I know it has helped my W see me in a good light, I need to stop doing this.
- Stop doing nice things for her except making coffee in the morning...I want to stick with this one.
- “ignore” her a bit at home. Be nice, positive but not "there" for her
- GAL…go out once per week with work or other friends + go to Crossfit three times per week