Should I go? Advice?

[MrBond]

"I did not have an affair. The relationship I had with the OW was with the full knowledge and support and consent of my W. "

And I will explain this to you one last time. When you have sex with someone who is not your spouse, it's an affair. Period. The sooner you understand that, the easier your situation will be to fix. You said your W was hurt by what you did. That's how spouses feel when they are betrayed in a relationship. It's why you feel the way you do now. Why are you getting upset about this?

"I don't think you understand my sitch at all. I am not trying to play 'victim' here,"

Oh I understand it very well. I've seen many people with the exact same situation you've been in and I've seen what they did to save their marriages. You seem to only want to listen to what you want to and dispel the advice that you don't agree with.

She does have a right to do what she wants to just as you do. Does it make it morally right? Of course not, but you two already broke that rule when you both went outside the M and introduced other people. That's why your W doesn't feel the need to be bound my your moral attitudes at the moment.

I'll tell you one last thing. The main thing that saved my M and many others that have come and gone through this website is that we listened to any and all advice given to us. Especially the ones that we disagreed with. You can learn something from everyone.

In fact, DBing is about doing something different. Just because you interpret something one way (you saying your W is in an "A" and you weren't), doesn't mean that everyone (especially your W) has to agree with you.

Have you ever thought that what I tell you is what your W could be thinking? And that if you figured out a way to answer and change the challenges I bring up, that you situation could actually get better?

But hey, I saved my M. What you do is up to you.