"Didn't you do the same when you had your A? What makes this any different?"
MrBond - I'm going to try to explain this one last time. I did not have an affair. The relationship I had with the OW was with the full knowledge and support and consent of my W. Eventually, my wife was upset and uncomfortable with the emotional aspects of that relationship. Now, I would agree this became an EA, and I ended it and have had NC since.
I also whole heartedly disagree with your reasoning here. So, if you wrong someone, make a mistake, and it hurts their feelings, then that person is completely justified in doing wrong to you?
I disagree. Period. If my W cheated / cheats on me, has an A, and she has in the past, then am I justified in doing the same?
No.
Period.
If you think anyone is justified in having an A for any reason, I must be clear and let you know that I do not see eye to eye with you on this.
I was never justified in doing anything to punish, hurt, or get revenge on my W for her transgressions, and conversely, neither is she toward me.
"Treat you like what? She's living her life the way she wants to which is what everyone wants. You are the one who allows the bad feelings to come up in you. You're just getting a taste of how she felt when you carried on with the OW. It doesn't matter that you stopped your own A. She had to deal with all of that too."
Yes, she did and is having to deal with fallout from my mistakes. However, I am appalled at your cavalier attitude that she is justified in returning the favor.
I don't think you understand my sitch at all. I am not trying to play 'victim' here, but for all intents and purposes, my current sitch is my W is a WAW and I am a LBS.
