jim0987 #4 - strengthening my inner cat

[sandi2]

So my PMA was not good in fact I was hacked off about my situation.

And when it's not good......you start screwing up by second guessing yourself and rehashing the past again and saying you are trying to get your head around....and ask something that has already been addressed. So it seems to me if your mood is going to dictate all if this, your priority should be to have a PMA.

My W was kind of excluded from it all and I was curt/terse with her. Asked her not to talk accross me

Which I already told you how you dealt with that time was okay. Now, by the way you word it, I am wondering if you reacted out of being in a bad mood or if you really all about holding to a boundary.

Told her that I didn't really like the dress she wants D3 to wear for the nursery photos today but that I will put her in that as that's what W wants. She tried to tell me I'm wrong so I said I had a right to an opinion.

Is this the same situation where you said she was talking over you (interfering with you handling the kids)? B/c you are rehashing it, and this time you make it sound a little different. Was she dressing the little girl and you did not like her choice of dress? It makes a difference. IMO, you replying by saying you had a right to an opinion sounds more b'tchy than manly, but that's just me.

I sorted her and stripped the sheets but didn't put the stuff straight in the machine. I intended to do it this morning but it was a 180 opportunity missed.

You took care of your child, while allowing her mother to sleep (I might add). Why is it a big deal you didn't put the sheets in washer immediately? Don't sweat the small stuff.

So my confusion comes from how I should be when interacting with my W - friendly, upbeat and talkative or distant and uncaring. I can't seem to find a middle ground as she seems constantly angry or sad.

Thought this had been covered.

You have been giving others support. What would you tell another LBH in this type stitch?

This is how its been for a long time and so its difficult to see how this might give her pause for thought.

If what gives her pause for thought? You listed several behaviors above. Which one are you referring to as causing her pause?