Maybell XVIII

[Maybell]

Thank you!! That's what I needed to hear. I am too direct sometimes.

It is frustrating the way it's impacting me because my boys are climbing into bed with me every night and I don't sleep well because they're so clingy. S6 cries when I put him to bed because another day passed without his dad. I'm proud of S8 for reaching out to the guidance counselor himself, but for pete's sake, an 8 year old child should not have to find his own therapist because his dad is abandoning him!!

But thanks for the guidance, that was exactly what I needed to hear.

I no longer care if he values me or comes back. I would like SOMEONE to love me deeply and intimately, and to choose to accept me for who I am. What I basically want my H to do at this point is step up for his children. If he eventually also chooses to accept and love me deeply then it would make life simpler on many levels. But it doesn't have to be him for me to be happy. I just want someone to snuggle on the couch who thinks I'm awesome.

And before I start hearing about it... I'm pretty sure I'm awesome. I have really risen to the challenge of this experience in the last six months (not so well before that, but in the last six months I have), and while I'm still in the process of becoming, I am good enough. I just want to be with someone else who is also awesome so we can put our awesomeness together and be bigger than we were alone.