Thanks unbidden. Do you mean by text or to call him? As I'm now 2 hours away and we don't have kids together, there isn't any 'natural' contact. But we do have shared housing, animals and finances, so potentially plenty to talk about.

In the weeks after BD, we talked every week or so. A lot about our M, his A, what and why etc. This went on for a couple of months. Last time we spoke (mid Sept) he said he needed to work on himself before getting into a 'big' R again (but he hasn't since finished the A.) He was reading self help books and thinking of IC.

I began to feel that my 'loving' contact in those first 2 months might be encouraging a stable triangle - almost supporting the A... And I didn't really feel the talking made much difference. Meeting up did - we did that once - and H was really affected by that.

I think he may feel he can't get in touch unless he has decided what he wants to do..

So, I guess I'm just not sure what to do at this stage...Any thoughts folks?

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus