I'm going to give a little tap to the side of your head: You took off to NY to see fall leaves and you're focusing on, he didn't say goodbye. I know you're still very early in this but find something to celebrate every day, whether you want to or not. Do it for 21 days and see where you are then.

"I feel unloveable, unwanted and unvaluable and I've let him make me feel that way. I don't want that. "

I would just bet that was there before you met him based on what you've said about your childhood. Sometimes we unconsciously choose a mate who we think can fix us. Then we find they can't and feel abandoned again while they didn't even know what they'd signed up for it.

You can fix you with or without him.

That's your path in this finding your way to the real you.

Have a great trip.

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss