Don't know if I belong here....

[Okabe]

I've been thinking on my contributions to what I have done to sabotage our marriage and it is hard for me to come up with a detailed list. The W and I have had a low conflict relationship for so long (which I am sure is part of the problem) it is hard for me to come up with detailed answers. This is what I know so far.

Our intimacy dance: I come from a family where affection was hus not shown in hugs, cuddling, etc. I like this kind of affection, but can be very absent minded about it. So often I will get caught up in other activities and seem pretty distant. She will also retreat off to her own corner (often online gaming) and when I am thinking "some affection or time together would be nice" I see her at the computer and end up not approaching her. I will end up going to bed early (I work early hours) and she doesn't come to bed until late. A poor dynamic and when you add that I want sexual intimacy on top of that, she then feels upset for me wanting her to be ready to go without being close before hand. I see my part in this without a doubt. What am I doing about it now? Currently nothing since I am trying to detach.

I tend to be a "fixer" or "placater". If there is something that needs to be done, h