Thank you TripleJ! Glad to see you here too!
I think that having an optimistic attitude is the secret to success, for sure....

Question for the vets, to all those who are now living with their S's again. And particularly to any women who have H's who felt "tied down".... and initially had lost a closer connection in the M. What would you say was the technique that worked the best for you in the long run in drawing them back?

Was it

your appearance of moving on with out them

not initiating much contact, letting him come to you

your warm, unconditional friend-like behavior during contacts

your validation or acceptance of their anti-M statements

all of the above?

I think I do have the basics going, would love to hear from others though!

When I read DB, about LRT- this one point stands out:

"resist getting into any conversations about your R"
Ok- I never initiate any R convos, does this also mean when H does, to not get into it, too? Unless it's super serious, like I'm thinking of D papers or something, of course.......

oh, and a few more significant steps to add to my first post:
-we have ML twice during our S so far, both find each other attractive- no question there.
-H admitted to mutual friend earlier in our S that he still loves me, but this whole thing is "not about love" (good sign the feelings are there deep down)

Last edited by rj2; 02/24/04 03:58 PM.
Master the self-fulfilling prophecy.. Act 'as if' it's going to happen and make it be!!