Hey Sarah, I'm sorry you're here too. I hate to say it, but it sure sounds gloomy to me too. Get the book and hopefully he'll be open to reading it as well. I really hope we're wrong.
PS. Is there any way of contacting the woman discreetly? Maybe she will be honest with you after years have passed But seriously, even if he HAS had an affair... you need to decide right now if you want to KNOW the facts (which might very well tear you apart) or just improve your situation. It's much easier saying this from where I sit, but if you want to keep your family intact, it would be best to keep all that in the past and work on your future.
Get the book ASAP and try to read it together so you're not left trying to scheme up ways of getting him to read it too.
But seriously, even if he HAS had an affair... you need to decide right now if you want to KNOW the facts (which might very well tear you apart) or just improve your situation. It's much easier saying this from where I sit, but if you want to keep your family intact, it would be best to keep all that in the past and work on your future. 
