Heather, Your daughter needs to address her issues and deal w/them. I think you did the right thing by responding honestly to her. She needs to be seeing someone and yes, AA is where she needs to be going right now. There are plenty of AA meetings around and there's no reason that she can't locate a meeting near her home.
She's 20 years old and needs to learn to how to deal w/responsibility and stop leaning on mom to fix everything for her and I think you are beginning to realize you can't fix her...she's got to fix herself. Going back to school would be too much of a hurdle for her right now and just think of the money that would be wasted on another year of incompletes, etc. Has she begun to repay the $2500 she owes from last year? This might be a good place for her to start accepting responsibility, i.e., by paying her debts and not expecting her mom to do it for her. After all, you've got enough on your plate.
I know you don't want to hear this, but get those drawers in the mail or have UPS or FEDEX pick them up in the next week or so. Why? Because if you don't, he's going to continue to text you about them and I'm sure you want to have some peace and quiet and not be getting texts from him about them or give him an excuse to contact you about other things. If it would help, have your daughter pack them up for you when she's free during the day or evening.
Hang in there. I think you're doing great!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
