Raliced - Climbing Without a Rope

[Maybell]

Well, true, but I didn't say "I will if you will." I just said "I do."

That doesn't mean I think nobody has the right to stop standing if that's what feels right. But if you make that choice, be sure it aligns with your personal values, boundaries, and integrity, and isn't retaliatory or angry. Your self-respect is in the balance.

Sometimes I get the sense that the urge to walk away is made in an effort to control the WAS. Like, we have so much confidence in DBing that we feel like we get to decide whether or not the marriage will recover through our unilateral efforts. Choosing to walk away is like flying them the bird and saying "You lose!" It's not a decision we come to based on an acceptance of our current situation (which could change the situation in itself.)

I hope this was clear. Sometimes I find myself on a roll and my actual point was made in the first line.