First...CONGRATS on the interview!!!!! Knock 'em dead!
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I have found that as my financial sitch has gotten worse, I find myself going back to that victim place in my mind and I really have to work at stopping myself from going there.
This is good, that you are catching yourself... practice and time. The other day filling out the D paperwork, with all the financials, I caught myself there for a minute, because like your W, mine left after gettng a job and when the plan was to start paying down debt, etc...I had to tell myself to knock it off, reality is what it is, etc...
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Of course what does it say about me that I loved this person? What about her was I so attracted to? Why was I so willing to let her behave the way she did? All things about ME and my flaws.
I have been having the same ruminations lately. I found a book called "Emotional Vampires" by a clinical psychologist regarding the personality disorders...and under "The Passive-Aggressive Histrionic" I gained a lot of clarity about my stbx (and yes she was diagnosed with that, which prompted her to quit with that IC). I wouldn't use the term "flaws" though...imo, when you are in a M, you each teach the other how to react to you, and when the love is there, you do want to please your partner, so you overlook somethings, adapt to responding in ways that meet your needs as well, usually based on some deeply rooted fear...for me it was abandonment.
Thing about this journey, if you do the inner work, you identify those fears, get insight into the "why's" of yourself, and start fixing/healing them.
Those are really good questions, THAT is the work we need to do right there...maybe write them done for deeper introspection later, after you get employment, because that is job #1 at the moment.
Good luck with the interview!!!
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
The other day filling out the D paperwork, with all the financials, I caught myself there for a minute, because like your W, mine left after gettng a job and when the plan was to start paying down debt, etc...I had to tell myself to knock it off, reality is what it is, etc...
