Last night, around 230 am, I get up to use the bathroom. My phone dings, like an email or text, I think nothing of it, and continue to the bathroom. I get out and the W is standing on the opposite side of the bed with my phone in her hand. "someone is sending you coochie pics on your phone....." I said "WHAT?! are your serious? from who!?" She just kinda laughed and said " you are acting all high and mighty but you're still doing the same sh*t" I pleaded to her that I swear I don't know who that is.
I even told her to call the number and see who it was, to check the phone bill and see that it was the only time that number had ever texted me! It was a number I've never seen before! She then proceeded to look at the entire convo between me and the OM's XGF. She was upset because I was "telling her our business" She saw that I had expressed my hurt and longing to reconcile with my W, and was looking for nothing more than advice. I again said that I was regretful and did not think she would care, as she told me before. She was upset nonetheless.
She gave me the phone back and I called that number back right away. To make that short, this woman was trying to reach someone totally different than me! I made sure to have the phone loud enough for her to hear the convo. I like to think that she believed me, because when I had my infiidelity years ago, I would react totally different and not soo confident that I had nothing to worry about.
I talked a little bit more about how I dont know who it was and that was sorry for communicating to the XGF. And that the only person I want to talk to, doesnt want wo have anything to do with me. I told her that I love her, and only her, even though she may not love me. She repsponed "I never said I didn't love you, but it's just not as strong as it used to be"
To cut it short, I ended the convo on "It hurts me to see you soo hopeless about us, but I can understand why you would be, I just ask that you don't throw in the towel just yet....goodnight, I love you" She responed in the same.
On a side note: She did reiterate, albeit semi angrily, that she does not talk to the OM anymore. I have yet to come accross evidence to the contrary. Possibly due to no snooping?
I am scared that this may have been a major blow to my already minimally effective DB'ing efforts. Is there a way that I could have handled this better?
ME: 29 / W: 29 M: 10 (11 in March 2015) BD (ILYBNILWY): 07/26/14 S:12 / S: 7 "We need to separate" : 08/31/14 Wants to see others: 10/11/14 Separation looming
