Wife walked away (4 months ago now) thread 3

[BigMac]

Zues126,

The reality check is interesting. When the WAW is in the fog they obviously are not thinking straight.

The reality is that life being a single parent is very hard. Our WAW's get stuck in this fantasy of the romance, and excitement of the OM. They get so used to having a husband provide for them, that they don't comprehend that life apart is much harder (for both parties and the children).

I feel like they get stuck in this selfish place. At least that is where my WAW is.

I scheduled a FaceTime call with her yesterday to go over care schedules for S9. At first she lied and said she had a meeting, which I replied to her saying that she committed to going over care items.

She dials me back via FaceTime, and looks to be a hot mess. No makeup, puffy everything, greasy hair. It looks like she hasn't showered for a couple days. It is mid day, and she isn't at work (she was at her house on the couch).

She was being as difficult as she could possibly be. I had shifted my weeks around to accommodate her love bird trip with the OM. All I wanted to do was nail down who was watching S9 on what weeks, and how we were going to handle dealing with some doctors appointments and stuff.

She was doing anything she could to just be a pain, including saying that she could just cancel her vacation. (I don't want to read into this one, but I have an inkling that there is trouble in paradise with the OM - She posted on social media that nobody wanted to party with her this weekend, and when I dropped S9 off at school Monday the OM's car was not at her house).

She is visibly agitated when I talk to her, and keeps saying I am controlling her (I am just affirming by boundaries, not being used, and putting the needs of S9 first). Talking to my therapists, this is some of the behavior that addicts display as they become accountable for their own actions.

For her, rent, power etc is due in 4 days. She has to respond to a divorce petition in roughly 3 weeks. Her friends have all been used up and are leaving her as they see who she has turned into (lying and using people).

And after a spring and summer living as a single woman, running up credit cards, going on flings with her OM she has spent the past couple weeks as a soon to be divorced adult, swapping kid schedules and living with D16 in the house (who can be quite the pain). She had her first weekend without D16 and S9, which I'm pretty sure she spent most of it alone.

Reality just might be setting in for her. Sadly it might be to late.

At the end of the call, all I could say is "You are just another person to me, I just just want to ensure that S9 is happy and healthy and that we are the best parents to him we can possibly be"