Maybell XVII

[labug]

Ok.

I accept that he has some sort of relationship with her which I can not control.
I also accept that he will lie and/or dodge accepting responsibility for the truth of this relationship and its consequences on our family.

I also accept that he is not going to change or become a more responsible or admirable person anytime soon.

I accept that he is not a person with whom a relationship would be either healthy or desirable right now.

None of these truths MUST harm me. They are no commentary on my desirability, on my quality, or my worthiness.

I can decide to walk away at any time because I have that power and right, regardless of his choices. I also have the power and right to remain standing for the marriage until I am done. I am not yet done and that's ok. I do not owe anyone any explanation for that choice.

Sometimes we have to walk through the fire to get to this^^^ We only get stronger and closer to our real selves by doing the difficult stuff. By asking the question "Do I control me or do I let this person, this situation, this emotion control me?"

And the next time you're triggered you can look back at this and take strength from remembering, "I've been here before and I got through it. I didn't die, the sky didn't fall. I can do this again."

We're all tested by things outside our control throughout life. Learning to manage us makes it possible to live a happy life, an honorable life, a joyful life.

A past member of this board posted this on FB. It's a meme so you may have seen it: One day she finally grasped that unexpected things were always going to happen in life. And with that she realized the only control she had was how she chose to handle them. So she made the decision to survive using courage, humor and grace. She was the queen of her own life and the choice was hers.

Have a great week, Woman Who Owns Her Life.

ht to needsGrace (( ))