The books are great for understanding psychology and how we can use it to tidy up our side of the street. I used to read books and have all sorts of 'aha' moments as well as feelings of hope.
On your other post, I think the letters are a great idea. I used to write them too, and still do if something really frustrates me, before speaking about things to my wife. Most of the time though I would reread what I had written later in the day or the following morning and leave it at that without speaking about the issue to my wife.
Me: 31, W: 29 T: 4 M: 2 Kids: 3 (SS: 7, SD: 4, D: 3) Separated, still living together: Nov 2013 Separate bedrooms: Feb 2014 W working away; kids with me: Nov 2014