I have read through your threads and I have some questions and thoughts...
You seem confused as to what GAL means...which is why Mr. Bond asked you about it...
GAL is exactly what it stands for...get a life. It means get involved in things that make you happy. Things that have nothing to do with marriage. Classes, church, skydiving, birdwatching, etc...
It most definately does not mean dating, although some people do take it that way, and the reality is if you are trying to save your M, dating, is NOT the best option. Even if attention from someone of the opposite (or same) sex makes you feel better.
GAL will not save your M by any means, that isn't what it is meant to do. It is meant to get you involved in your own life and your own interests, and to help make you (you being the LBS) a happier person.
I am a bit confused, because you said you want to remain married however you are pushing hard for a separation.
While I understand protecting yourself, from what you wrote, it seems to me that it is more of a manipulation tactic to keep him from filing for a divorce.
That isn't a tug of war that you want to get into with a MLCer.
As far as OW...if this IS MLC...she didn't sneak into your home and bamboozle your H into an affair.
She wasn't the snake dangling the apple infront of Adam.
If it hadn't been her it would have been someone else.
MLCer's are simply ripe for A. They just are. Just as they are ripe to try to change just about every aspect of their lives in order to feel better.
Trust me, just because your H appeared happy months prior to BD, it was a front. They don't just flip over night.
So do you love your H? Do you want to remain married for any other reason than you married him?
What are you doing to GAL, because there is no reason for you to wait for a formal separation before you decide to take up a hobby or plant a garden or jump out of a plane...
The only person keeping you from doing that is you...
That is enough for now, I don't want to cause any defensiveness and I do have the ability to do that...
Just know one other thing...the people here, while we don't always agree or even like each other, are all here to try to help. The first step in that is to try to understand. Sometimes that means real nitpicky clarification of the meaning of a typed sentence...
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
