Going Down Hill

[zed]

So this is starting to move quickly just got an unexpected email W is making a appointment with mediator. Would like a couple thoughts on a couple things. W now says she will move out and take the kids. Where we live I have rights to 50/50 time. Also I get that she is under the impression that she wont have to work. Which again where we live she is expected to help with child support and she did take Civil engineering so she should be able to get a good job. (Thanks to me for paying off her student loan) Should I tell her what I expect prior to mediation. I have 2 reasons why I don't want to. I expect her to flip out again and would rather have someone there. And the other one is I think it would be a nice suprise for her and might shock her (maybe a little vengeful).
The only reason I can think of to tell her is that I do care for her and hope she might be able to cope better if I told her ahead of time.