How to start rebuilding? - 2

[elltee2]

It sounds like we are going through a lot of the same things. A few questions;

Although W is complimenting you on your changes (which are great, btw), does she value progress as much as you do? Since your time apart has she done or accomplished anything to move forward as a human being?

That can be a huge issue especially for young couples. Some of us really strive for success in work, formal education, and activities outside of work. Others define themselves differently. Either but what they are, what they were, or something so simple as their job. Yet, others are totally cool with how things are and aren't seeking change or progress. It is important to you to perform the 180's and improve yourself, if such improvement isn't important to her, then you'll keep treading water in life when you get back together.

Who do you like better, the guy you are after her or the guy you were with her? Maybe she will come back and things will eventually workout. On the other hand, although it kills to think about-maybe she wont. If you can unilaterally find your own fulfillment, why not just stick with that for now and leave her out of your goal setting process?