Do I walk away from WAW? (2)

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Kids in bed, another night alone with my thoughts. Wondering today if my W is truly capable of love, at least right now. Near the end of our talk the other night, she said "ten years is a lot of time". Is that it? Has she just run out? Is she so closed off, that I know her too well for her to feel comfortable with me? Is she only able to be romantic with people who have just met her, and pour adoration on her, as I did when we first met? (And still did until recently, I would say) is she only able to feel safe with someone who hasn't fully come to understand her yet? Will she just do this over and over again for the rest of her life?

All dark questions. She said over and over early on that she still feels close to me, doesn't want to lose me as a friend, wants to be with me for the rest of her life, just not "with" me. Is that just the way it is? The ten years comment really gets me, as if she's just run out of love. I want to promise her that the love I will give her if she comes back will be better than ever. But I can't.

Just feeling lonely tonight. Making myself a nice dinner and early to bed.