Just for clarity, what is the common understanding of "dropping the rope" around here? I thought it meant to give up on the M completely and file. Tar, in the context you used it, it seems like you're equating dropping the rope to DBing.

I feel like when I'm DBing, I'm holding onto the rope in the best way I can...giving our M the best chance to someday be R'd that I can, while the other 50% of the vote still rests in WAW's hands. And it is also maximizes the chance of WAW deciding to work on M, as most anti-DB instincts drive them further away. It still will be there decision either way, but don't make the BigD decision easier for them.


Me 38, WAW 30
D11 (former marriage)
S2
T 8 years
M 3 years
BD 8/20/23
S 8/20/23