To Pursue or Not

[Arcola]

So an update. After telling wife I wasn't going to move out she responded we would have to go to court then. However, a couple of days later after we talk some about sitch she isn't sure if she wants a divorce or not but she does plan on moving into her rental when its approved by the state for the foster kids.

The tall we had was about me comparing her to other people we know who have experience d similar sitchs. PA or EA and divorce. She doesn't like being compared or contrasted to others. She feels hers is somewhat innocent or different.

Also we spoke of how we feel. She feels because I'm not engaging with her much I don't care or think its all her fault. I validated I was wrong to only blame her from the convo we had about two days ago. I expressed I contributed to where we are now too.

On another note, she's still talking to OM. No surprise here, but after some snooping I truly feel like I'm number 2. I know I'm not in the forefront right now anyway, but this was like confirmation. So the snooping revealed when she was driving back from California by herself and our kids shed call OM first and talk a while and then call me. This pattern occurred about 4 times as she drove back home. I also noticed she seems to talk to OM each morning for 10 to 20 minutes.

Well I'll be staying the pace until adoption of kids and see what happens.