" I would randomly say I love you when she wouldn't expect it. I would rub her back at times and assure her that I loved her."
That's NOT romantic. Those are just things that you should have done DAILY. Romantic is roses, wine and dine, dancing, a weekend getaway, etc.
"Things which I did do a lot, but the sex part of physical touch LL I know is an area I severely lacked. I admit that I did not do enough to initiate times for intimacy and that is something I need to work on."
You didn't want sex with her?
"I think that both of us were somewhat uncomfortable talking about sex,"
She wasn't. Why do you think she got you that book?
"how often we wanted it, how important it was to us and therefore expected that it would just happen when the times were right."
It's so obvious that this was just YOUR thinking and NOT HERS.
"There were times when I've wanted sex and she would reciprocate but those times were few, a lot of it being because of the porn would kill my sex drive, and therefore caused me just not initiate. Or she would initiate sometimes and even though I wanted it, I told her I wasn't in the mood and couldn't pull myself together because my drive just wasn't there and really felt ashamed."
Are you going to a C for this?
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
