If you want him back, or if you at least want to keep that option open for now while you decide, then think in terms of what moves the ball in the right direction.
Option 1 is a little cold. It may come to that in the end, but I think you should hear him out.
Option 2 is better. Always take the high road. Don't mention the "respects our love and history" part, though. Right now your love and history have no value to him at all, sadly. Really all you have to do with option 2 is listen to his proposal. Validate where possible, and give absolutely no definite response on any issue. Whatever he proposes, you'll "have to think about that."
Quote:
He doesn't really deserve kindness and compassion.
You have to bury this. He may not deserve it, but you're the adult here, so you give it anyway. I'm glad to see that you know you have to do this.
Finally, he said by phone or email. It can be really difficult to hold back emotion on the phone. email is definitely safest -- he can say whatever he wants and your reaction will be completely private. You will miss the opportunity to validate that you would have with the phone. Guess it depends on how much you think that is worth right now, and if you're sure you can hold it together on the phone.
