Need help. Scared, confused pt 2

[PeterV2]

She said she wants to still be friends.
Well that's not a bad place to start. Face it. Your marriage is over - the one you had. Period. You could even tell her that, but then you could also tell her that you would like to build a new marriage with her, unless you find that too pursuing. Nonetheless, you need to build a new marriage with her, and that starts as being friends, being kind and not assuming that you can act like her husband. You're back to courting. And that's a delicate dance, especially if there are other suitors in play.

My W wants to be friends. We spend time together as friends. Anytime we get into R talk it degrades to rewriting history and me getting all the blame. I really need to stay away from that crepe.

I would try very hard not to make any snarky comments about her behaviour. If you don't like what she's saying give her the time out signal and take a walk. When you come back move on to a different topic.

Yes it does seem like bipolar insanity. Reinforce the positives. Ignore the negatives.