bdub, I had posted on your thread above one day before my H admitted OW. It's funny how much can change in a few days. I'm finding the clarity that you now have, and find myself letting go. When I do get emotional, it's still about the idea of marriage, what might have been possible, and the illusion of who he was that drives those emotions. When I look at the situation clearly, it's hard to understand why anyone would put up with such nonsense.

I'm not dismissing DB, but I'm seeing that in order to truly DB, you have to truly detach, and giving up and moving on is definitely detachment. The point of DB is also to save ourselves, with or without spouse. I'm planning to put all my energy in that direction.

Thanks for all your support.

M: 43 H: 39
D: 14
Married 15 Together 16
BD: 6/2014
S: 8/2014
OW revealed 10/2014
Instigated dissolution 12/2014, in progress
So over it!