"You may wish you could put enough pressure on him that he would at least make you feel you were valuable enough that he won't let a "label" scare him down. I mean, seriously! I believe if you told him "no", he would say "Okay then, cheers!" and be gone on his own. Now, it may cause him to consider that MM has really changed and he needs to get a different game plan, IDK. " <<<<< can you explain again??
I was referring to him asking you why you had to put a label on it. You would prefer he clarify it so that you could find "closure" instead of analyzing it to death.......however, no matter how much you want him to value you......even to the point of you pressuring him into giving this trip a name or category or label......he won't do it. You want him to value you so much that it overcomes any fear he has of labeling a trip or relationship. (Your persistence is the same as pressure to him.). If you tell him you won't go (trying to pressure him into valuing you enough to step up), I think he would rather choose to say "Cheers" and leave without you. He would do it before he would man up and give you a decent answer to your request about how to categorize this overnight trip. He just wants you to agree to going without him having to call it anything. He would do without your company before he satisfied you with a glimmer of hope about the future. He does not want to be hooked.
Hope that explains it better.
Look MM, it doesn't matter how much we want you to keep your dignity and hold out till he cries "uncle", it is what makes you feel right.....happy....and cherished. If this man does it for you, then it is your free choice to do whatever you want. You don't have to do what we want you to do. I think you have grown just enough to want what you deserve.....which is respect. You want the man you love to show you some freaking respect!!! Why does it seem so hard for him to do? Everyone wants to feel they are valuable to the people they love most in the world. It is not too much to expect. Neither should it be compromised......nor sacrificed. Did you hear that, MM? Do not sacrifice your self value for his love.....b/c if he really loves you then he should value you. That is what love truly is, don't you think? And if it is just his way of loving......then ask the question, "At what price?". How much are you willing to pay for his way of loving? If getting his love costs you your self worth (dignity, value, respect) are you willing to pick up the tab?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
