May your eyeliner,

[Ggrass]

I don't doubt he was assaulted on the quiet. I don't doubt his words.

I do know h always went to great lengths to prove s16 totally untruthful he did the same to a degree with me to others.

I do know s16 has memory issues as add. S16 is very good at turning issues where he should be held accountable to something he's done to being totally innocent. Ie hanging out with smothers while smoking but s16 is very anti smoking as his grandfather died of a hole in the Kung smoking related traumatic for a 7-8yo.

So my logical side knows there will be 2 sides plus the facts. Which were always very muddy, given al, the gas lighting going on my head is spinning to a degree more of indignation not rumination.

I do know the whole stigma of being branded the craze one. One of my besties of 30 years long before h came along tryed to tell me I was crazed when I wanted someone to talk to about what ss25 said about h crazee memory loss and out right fibbing. Her response he was fine at Saturdays charity do.

What I saw at mediation of h was a man who used to take pride in his appearance walk in dressed in second hand jumper belonging to his son, shirt with collar disorganised under jumper, this time clean jeans, last time jean were dirty. Presentation was off!
This man would make a big deal if I had a crumb on my face. Volatile blaming, others anger, memory loss, frantic doing, jumpy demeanour, unable to focus, forgetting minor stuff, being unable to express him, self violent outbursts are all a part of early dementure along with depressive moods. While I now really am not feeling like I want my h nor have my feeling of romance towards him I am more concerned for what may happen for his son, who lives with him.

If h is sliding down into dementure related problems, his son will have very little idea what he's letting himself in for. One friend has just gone down this crazed road for the last 4 years. The police nearly charged her for assaulting her mum and dumping her in a shopping center. Real story mum ran off got confused and told fibbers.

Another is in the stage h seems to be at with her h, he is total dementure at home when relaxed no need to put out an act. Then when out he can fool his own dr, about how well he is. Walk out door and say "who was that and why were we here again" with no idea at all. It concerns me being their neighbour.

Those facts are what makes me uncomfortable amount other things with h Big Bang plan.
The Big Bang plan is h delivers my property etc from mediation settlement in 6 trips over 2-3 days. He knows I am very uncomfortable with h being on my property.

Last time h was here inside my house he used it to check up on me! Ie go thru my bedroom and enter it. Blerk.
I have been inside his house once at his request, to have coffee. It was an awful experience, will not do it again.

Enough of the crap, might be going out with my oldest bestie to a cow boy event,
* Fans self*
Blushes
The guy I've dubbed hottest thing on legs at work I suspect will more than likely be there.
He now openly greets me, and will oogly me like Wednesday after work. That old saying turns heads applies. So if he asked me out need to practice but he's scarey younger than me.

"Hell yeah,"

Other dude that was from the past just a omg I wish I was good looking enough for that! Past
He's been separated and divorced nearly 2 years. He's a might for being there too. So at least I will know a couple of friendly blokes to chat to.
a fear of mine turning up to things not knowing anyone and feeling fish outta water.