Fresh separation - trying to play by the book

[Mozza]

Thanks a lot Jefe for your reply. As you said, I'm both happy I found you and sad that I had to.

I did read the 37 rules compiled by Sandi2. In fact, they were what brought me here and I keep them in an open tab. They gave me a little boost a couple of days ago and I'm still on that high. Very useful.

There are two anecdotes that explains why I wonder if I should open up again about my feelings.

1. After a week of begging and pleading and I-love-yous, I decided to get out of the way and adopt a DB attitude. After the conversation I told her: "I might look different tonight, but I feel just like yesterday inside" to which she replied "Thanks for telling me. I wasn't sure." Doubts had entered her mind already, probably because she considered me detached in the relationship. Now it's been over three weeks I've acted as if everything's fine, so I wonder if she thinks it proves I never cared much about her.

2. In 2009, we came close to a breakup and I successfully pleaded and begged her backed into the relationship. She told me then and recently that seeing my love for her, realizing we had something real, was one of the reasons she came back. She loves being loved and won't stay if she doesn't feel it.

Anyway, at this stage I won't be writing or calling her about it. I guess I'll keep it to myself for a good while longer. As you said, it's counter-intuitive.

(BTW, there seems to be a little typo in your signature: "WAW / Separated - 8/5/15")